[ just... still staring at the cat and the weird crab. Then he glances around at the other 3 occupants. He looks less than pleased. ]
... This place is going to stink. [ weirdly, the little boy seems to have his head on the most squarely, so he turns to him. ] Is that cat trained? If it has accidents, you're responsible for cleaning them up.
[He makes a somewhat sour face. When he scoops Pennyworth up, he hefts the cat up to one shoulder.] Please. Cats are cleaner than most humans. [BUT!] I've trained him. His name is Alfred Pennyworth.
The rooster is Felix, and he is not trained. He should be outside.
[Actually, Felix is kind of mean, so he's just gonna, uh... try to corral it out the door.]
[He was going to protest everybody gets a pet but him, but the serious little kid announcing the crab is named Louis Crabsworth definitely gets him off track.]
Is anyone kind of hungry for crabcakes all of a sudden. . . ?
Cats don't know how to use the restroom. I don't want to hear it.
[ but at least it won't be pooping in the corners (hopefully) and the chicken is being removed!! Crabs aren't as smelly. Probably. In any case, Hikage, friendly as ever, ignores the other two, making a beeline for the stack of boxes on the table. Or maybe his is the only box and everyone else got animals?? Unclear. Either way, he's going for it. ]
[The real murderer here is going to be hunger. Damian wrinkles his nose at Hikage.]
They go outside, or use litter. But they can be trained to use the bathroom.
[Felix is who he is most worried about! Which is why the rooster is gently dumped outside to be collected in a bit when he gets fed up with three roommates. When he's back, he's watching Hikage do the box so there will be a guinea pig for explosives.]
What is the time period for the three of you? [He's now scared, after hearing Hikage talk about cats.] The date.
[Running to get his box! Pulling out a huge axe and yelling 'YES!' Pulling out what looks like a nerf gun and smells like days old burgers, and yelling 'YES, YES!']
Oh, me? I'm from ye olde times. Fantasy times. But I'm also an alien who came to my fantasy planet in a space ship, so it's hard to say.
[ he doesn't know how to answer that question anymore... but he also looks a little perturbed by Magnus's giant axe (and also whatever the hell he just said but mostly the axe.) ]
[He cannot believe he is not only stuck trying to hold the braincell, but stuck with three people who can't even give him an exact measurement in time they have manifested!! AAAAA. He doesn't even inwardly close his eyes. He absolutely closes them in real time.
But they snap open when Magnus yells about the axe and the gun.]
[He did want the cat or chicken, but he'll take rave crab? I guess???]
Yup. Railsplitter is my axe, and I'm not trading it unless you have a puppy! Even then, it'd be a tough call. The Big Mac Sauce Gun is a very powerful weapon, though. +2 psychic damage.
[Glancing at Anaido, frowning at his coat and frowning at his obvious belief Magnus is a serial killer. But he can work with that belief if it means getting his own rave crab.]
Last chance, bud. Wouldn't want this falling into the wrong hands.
[ raising an eyebrow and tucking his box under one arm. ]
That's not the same thing.
[ his gun is perfectly normal, unlike this guy's gun which shoots condiments. Not that Hikage knows that. He doesn't want to know what Big Mac Sauce is... ]
... Why does the child seem more reliable than both of you already?
[Honestly, Damian does not begrudge Magnus a single bit for trading an axe for a puppy. Wow. He does want to close his eyes about the mention of plus two psychic damage, though.
You know what, he closes his eyes again briefly when the crab begins to dance. He's losing braincells by the second.]
Both can be used as a weapon, [to Hikage.] Don't underestimate them.
Which of you killed in the game you last participated?
[Did this cabin get, like, two of the three people who never committed an atrocity? Damian is still tired.]
You would be surprised how open some people are. [Pointedly.] The real suspicion isn't in how quickly some admit to killing. It's in how eager some are not to answer the question. [Also pointedly.]
I killed three others in the last week of our game: a roommate, a comrade, and a family member. However, all of us were required to die to have access to the train home.
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Do not touch my cat. Pennyworth. [It's a call. He squats down to wait on stupid cat whims.] Or the rooster. [Pointing to the crab.] Is that yours?
They must have come with us.
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[Calling to see if the cat comes to him instead. When it doesn't, because it's a cat, he calls instead ]
Crabsworth! C'mere, boy! Dibs on Crabsworth.
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[The crab pokes him in the ankle.]
I...think the crab's name is Louis, actually. [He's bending down to pick it up, and it dances.] Aw, look at him.
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... This place is going to stink. [ weirdly, the little boy seems to have his head on the most squarely, so he turns to him. ] Is that cat trained? If it has accidents, you're responsible for cleaning them up.
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[He makes a somewhat sour face. When he scoops Pennyworth up, he hefts the cat up to one shoulder.] Please. Cats are cleaner than most humans. [BUT!] I've trained him. His name is Alfred Pennyworth.
The rooster is Felix, and he is not trained. He should be outside.
[Actually, Felix is kind of mean, so he's just gonna, uh... try to corral it out the door.]
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[He was going to protest everybody gets a pet but him, but the serious little kid announcing the crab is named Louis Crabsworth definitely gets him off track.]
Is anyone kind of hungry for crabcakes all of a sudden. . . ?
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[Alright. Sure. Louis Crabsworth dances on and on, and Anaido just lets out a huff, depositing it on his shoulders.]
Uh. [He's staring over at Magnus.] Please don't hurt the crab.
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[ but at least it won't be pooping in the corners (hopefully) and the chicken is being removed!! Crabs aren't as smelly. Probably. In any case, Hikage, friendly as ever, ignores the other two, making a beeline for the stack of boxes on the table. Or maybe his is the only box and everyone else got animals?? Unclear. Either way, he's going for it. ]
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[The real murderer here is going to be hunger. Damian wrinkles his nose at Hikage.]
They go outside, or use litter. But they can be trained to use the bathroom.
[Felix is who he is most worried about! Which is why the rooster is gently dumped outside to be collected in a bit when he gets fed up with three roommates. When he's back, he's watching Hikage do the box so there will be a guinea pig for explosives.]
What is the time period for the three of you? [He's now scared, after hearing Hikage talk about cats.] The date.
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[Running to get his box! Pulling out a huge axe and yelling 'YES!' Pulling out what looks like a nerf gun and smells like days old burgers, and yelling 'YES, YES!']
Oh, me? I'm from ye olde times. Fantasy times. But I'm also an alien who came to my fantasy planet in a space ship, so it's hard to say.
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The date? [A pause, and then he breaks out in a wide smile.] I have absolutely no clue! Hahaha, that's amnesia for you!
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Pass.
[ he doesn't know how to answer that question anymore... but he also looks a little perturbed by Magnus's giant axe (and also whatever the hell he just said but mostly the axe.) ]
-- Hey! Be careful with that!
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[He cannot believe he is not only stuck trying to hold the braincell, but stuck with three people who can't even give him an exact measurement in time they have manifested!! AAAAA. He doesn't even inwardly close his eyes. He absolutely closes them in real time.
But they snap open when Magnus yells about the axe and the gun.]
Do those belong to you?
[why does mom let YOU have weapons?!]
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[Holding up the nerf gun, though.]
Trade you this for one of the animals.
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[He looks at Magnus, then looks at the axe, and just.]
[There's something unspoken here. He smirks, and then just goes to put on his idiotic coat.]
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[ he is not happy about it... ]
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[Well, on his end anyway. Anaido can decide about the Louis Crabsworth. He looks between the other two after surveying the axe and gun.]
Railsplitter, and the Big Mac Sauce gun? [He glances at Hikage.] Should you be asking that when yours likely has a pistol?
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[He did want the cat or chicken, but he'll take rave crab? I guess???]
Yup. Railsplitter is my axe, and I'm not trading it unless you have a puppy! Even then, it'd be a tough call. The Big Mac Sauce Gun is a very powerful weapon, though. +2 psychic damage.
[Glancing at Anaido, frowning at his coat and frowning at his obvious belief Magnus is a serial killer. But he can work with that belief if it means getting his own rave crab.]
Last chance, bud. Wouldn't want this falling into the wrong hands.
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[He points to Louis, who just?? Starts dancing???]
Your axe can't do this, after all.
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That's not the same thing.
[ his gun is perfectly normal, unlike this guy's gun which shoots condiments. Not that Hikage knows that. He doesn't want to know what Big Mac Sauce is... ]
... Why does the child seem more reliable than both of you already?
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You know what, he closes his eyes again briefly when the crab begins to dance. He's losing braincells by the second.]
Both can be used as a weapon, [to Hikage.] Don't underestimate them.
Which of you killed in the game you last participated?
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[Why you gotta rub it in, Anaido. He just wants a pet :( ]
Not me! I made it to the end without killing even once. I even stopped a guy from doing a mid-trial!
[Be proud of him!]
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[STOP SOUNDING SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS]
[The crab continues to dance.]
I never even participated in a trial!
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[ Hikage shakes his head before replying. ]
If someone actually did, do you think they'd just tell you? It would make them suspicious immediately.
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You would be surprised how open some people are. [Pointedly.] The real suspicion isn't in how quickly some admit to killing. It's in how eager some are not to answer the question. [Also pointedly.]
I killed three others in the last week of our game: a roommate, a comrade, and a family member. However, all of us were required to die to have access to the train home.
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Brilliant detective, huh?
[Mean! But then he's distracted by. Child murder.]
Damn! How old are you, kid? You go hard!